"English" by T.S. Watt

I take it you already know
Of tough and bough and cough and dough? 
Others may stumble, but not you 
On hiccough, thorough, laugh, and through. 

Well done! And now you wish, perhaps, 
To learn of less familiar traps? 
Beware of heard, a dreadful word, 
That looks like beard and sounds like bird. 

And dead: it's said like bed, not bead-- 
for goodness' sake don't call it "deed"! 
Watch out for meat and great and threat 
(They rhyme with suite and and straight and debt). 

A moth is not a moth in mother, 
Nor both in bother, broth in brother, 
And here is not a match for there, 
Nor dear and fear for bear and pear, 

And then there's dose and rose and lose 
Just look them up--and goose and choose, 
And cork and work and cord and ward 
And font and front and word and sword, 

And do and go and thwart and cart-- 
Come, come, I've hardly made a start! 
A dreadful language? Man alive! 
I'd mastered it when I was five.

And yet to write it, 
the more I tried, 
I hadn't learned 
at fifty-five. 

AH!!! The Laughing Spaceman!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHHAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 
That is illogical!   Norman!! Help us!!

  [Show/Hide Quoted Message] (Quoting Message by Soylentgreen4u from Sunday, October 26, 2008 12:18:59 PM)

		Soylentgreen4u wrote:
		LOGIC IS LITTLE TWEETING BIRD CHIRPING IN MEADOW. LOGIC IS WREATH OF PRETTY FLOWERS THAT SMELL BAD. (OH,OH...I PROBABLY SHOULD NOT NOT OF POSTED THIS...I SENSE A MAJOR HEADACHE COMIN' UP FOR GUIDO & FEEZE)...

LOGIC IS LITTLE TWEETING BIRD CHIRPING IN MEADOW.

LOGIC IS WREATH OF PRETTY FLOWERS THAT SMELL BAD.

(OH,OH...I PROBABLY SHOULD NOT NOT OF POSTED THIS...I SENSE A MAJOR HEADACHE COMIN' UP FOR GUIDO & FEEZE)...

I AM TRULY INSPIRED TONIGHT ALL...EARLIER THIS EVENING I SPENT TWO HOURS LISTENING TO A WOMAN SPEAK AT A CHURCH NOT A 5 MINUTE WALK FROM MY RESIDENCE...
THE WOMAN SPEAKING WAS KIM PHUC. THIS WOMAN WAS THE SUBJECT OF PROBABLY THE MOST FAMOUS (OR INFAMOUS DEPENDING UPON YOUR VIEW) PHOTOGRAPH TAKEN DURING THE VIETNAM WAR (IF INTERESTED IN VIEWING...WIKIPEDIA..THEN HER NAME,YOU WILL UNDERSTAND,SHE IS THE LITTLE GIRL WITH HER CLOTHES COMPLETELY BURNED OFF FROM A NAPALM ATTACK),I WAS FORTUNATE ENOUGH TO GREET HER AS SHE ARRIVED AND SPENT ABOUT 10 MINUTES SPEAKING WITH HER. ...WE EXCHANGED HUGS,SHE SIGNED MY BOOK ABOUT HER ENTITLED "THE GIRL IN THE PICTURE"...AND THEN SHE WENT OFF TO PREPARE TO FOR HER SPEAKING ENGAGEMENT...AFTERWARDS WAS FORTUNATE ENOUGH TO SPEND MORE TIME TALKING WITH HER AND GET MY PIC TAKEN WITH HER....YES!!!...HER LIFE STORY AND
STRUGGLES ARE AWE INSPIRING,BUT HER CAPACITY FOR FORGIVENESS WAS WHAT IMPRESSED ME MOST...A LESSON TO BE SURE. EVEN THOUGH THE ROOM WAS CROWDED,SHE SPOKE TO ME AS IF WE WERE OLD FRIENDS...AN ABSOLUTE GEM OF A HUMAN BEING...KIM PHUC.

PLEASE VIEW THIS PICTURE,THEN REALIZE HOW LUCKY MOST OF US TRULY ARE.

AND YOU KNOW WHAT?,IF I'M JACK,I'M LETTING HER CATCH ME!!!...WHAT A LADY SHE WAS!...
FUNNY,WITTY AND A DAMN FINE LOOKIN' GAL TO BOOT!...

		guidogodoy wrote:
		I was honestly quite sad when Mr. Furley died. RIP Don. Hey, look...here comes Lana! Ah, how she lusted after Jack....      Soylentgreen4u wrote: ANYBODY REMEMBER "THREE'S COMPANY"?....OF COURSE YOU DO...ONE OF MY FAVOURITES.. AND GOOD 'OL DON KNOTTS (R.I.P.) AS THE LOVEABLE RALPH FURLEY,APARTMENT MANAGER EXTRAORDINAIRE ....WELL NOW EVERY TIME I SEE "LANA" LOGGED IN I THINK OF 'OL RALPH...REMEMBER THE CRUSH HE HAD ON THE CHARACTER "LANA"? ....IT WAS HILARIOUS "RALPH WANT LANA"!!!........DON'T BE MAD NOW LANA...

...MY GOD!!!,ONE SIMPLE QUERY,AND ALL THE PERVS COME OUT OF THE WOODWORK!...

		ronhartsell wrote:
		I don't know about you all, but after a shower, nothing feels better than spinning a Q-tip in my ear.  If I had a tail, I'd be a wagging fool.  So, maybe the Q is for it feeling Quite good!!!

The inventor of the cotton swab is supposed to have been one Leo Gerstenzang, in 1923 [1]. His product, which he named "Baby Gays", went on to become the most widely-sold brand name, "Q-tip". 
Just think youself lucky the name didn't stick!  We call them Cotton buds over here!

OK,I NEED HELP HERE!...JUST WHAT THE HELL DOES THE "Q" IN Q-TIP STAND FOR ANYWAY??
IT'S DRIVING ME MAAAAAAD!!!............

...........

................

WHERE THE HECK IS THAT VIDEO THINGY THAT USED TO BE ON THE HOMEPAGE?!? I MISS IT!!!!

You can hang in a left or hang in a right
The choice is yours to do as you might
The road is open wide to place your biddin

Now, wherever you turn, wherever you go
If you get it wrong, at least you can know
There's miles and miles to put it back together

		joedraper wrote:
		Aww!! thank you both for caring... I'll be fine still 'coming to terms' with a lot of ghosts from my past but I guess comes a time in your life when you must confront your 'inner demons' so to speak... but it's very comforting to know you guys care... xxx      Vaillant 3.0 wrote: Are you okay, Joe?      joedraper wrote: And there comes a time in the early morning hours, where even the shittest wine will do, sadly, I've reached that point.